How to Be a Good Dad Beyond 2023
What makes a good father? Has the answer to the question evolved in recent years, and will it continue to change as our children age?
As our values and perspectives shift as a society, many men realise their fatherhood roles are becoming far more dynamic and demanding, going far beyond what they received during their own adolescence. There’s a new approach to addressing your emotions and those of your children, managing financial resources in a turbulent economic period, finding more time in your busy schedules for meaningful moments together – no matter how much you love your family, it can often prove overwhelming.
Fatherhood is not just a responsibility but a privilege that offers immeasurable joy and fulfilment. It’s a lifelong commitment that requires learning, adapting, and growing alongside your children. In this guide, our specialists at Strong Space Counselling will explore some key points on how to be a good dad, as well as provide actionable insights on nurturing a bond with your children that is both deep and enduring.
What Makes a Good Father?
Knowing Your Child
Take an active interest in the inner workings of your child’s life, be it their schooling, hobbies, and wildest dreams, becoming their unwavering supporter and confidant. Doing so will help you better understand their strengths, weaknesses, aspirations, and fears, enabling you to provide tailored guidance and support, fostering their holistic development and well-being.
Being Actively Present
Have you ever been told that a great deal of being a parent is just ‘showing up’? Your presence in a child’s life is a gift and a cornerstone of how to be a good father. Wherever you can, engage in your child’s life with intention and attention, balancing your need for personal space with their need for real connection and support. Actively participating in their daily routines, attending school events, enjoying free time together, and simply being available for meaningful conversations fosters a sense of trust and security in your children.
Quality Time and Connection
As free time might be scarce, try to prioritise quality over quantity; this principle is crucial in understanding how to be a good dad. Invest in moments free of distraction, creating a safe space where memories are forged, and bonds are strengthened. Whether through shared hobbies, outdoor adventures, or simple everyday moments, finding quality time is how you create a treasure trove of memories and learning experiences for both father and child.
Family Meals as Bonding Opportunities
Family dinners aren’t just nutritional necessities. As one of the few moments where every household member comes together, these moments of connection and conversation at the dining table can be priceless, embodying the warmth and security a good father provides. Family meals offer an opportunity for open communication, sharing of experiences, and fostering a sense of belonging and unity in a daily routine.
Fostering a Loving Relationship with Children’s Mother
A harmonious relationship with your child’s mother – whether you're together or not – lays a foundation of security and consistency for your child. Demonstrating respect, love, and a joint effort to care for your kids embodies what makes a good father, providing a relational blueprint for your offspring. This respectful co-parenting environment nurtures your children's emotional health, offering them a stable and loving foundation from which to venture out into this daunting world around them.
Expressing Affection Openly
From the second your child is brought into the world, you might feel it’s a no-brainer that you love them unconditionally. All of your actions from that day forward are dedicated to that fact. Even so, expressions of love, both verbal and physical, are vital.
A good father isn’t afraid to show love, adapting his expressions as his children grow, ensuring they always feel cherished and valued, rather than merely hoping it is implied for their acts of service. From hugs and kisses to words of affirmation and encouragement, these expressions of love build your child’s self-esteem and sense of worth.
Participative Rule-Setting and Discipline
Discipline, when fair and consistent, instils a sense of responsibility and respect into your child. Engage your children in setting rules and consequences, creating a home environment where expectations are clear, and positive behaviour is acknowledged and rewarded. Such a collaborative approach to discipline empowers your children, fostering a sense of responsibility and accountability for their actions.
Allowing Autonomy and Risk-Taking
Allow your children the freedom to explore, make mistakes, and learn. Support their journey towards autonomy, providing a safety net but not stifling their growth. This balance is delicate but crucial in the art of how to be a good dad. Encourage them to take calculated risks, make decisions, and learn from their experiences, all under your watchful yet non-restrictive gaze.
Embracing Continuous Learning
Our learning and development never stops, especially in fatherhood. To understand how to be a good father, seek wisdom from other admirable father figures, absorbing their lessons and adapting them to your unique parenting style. Engage with other fathers, read parenting books, and when feeling particularly stuck, consider counselling services for fathers for extra support. Continuous learning equips you with the knowledge and skills needed to navigate the complexities of modern fatherhood effectively.
Prioritising Self-Care
We’ve discussed how to be a good dad for your child, but long-term growth and fulfilment always start with self-care. Acknowledge your mental and physical needs, adopting a lifestyle that reflects health and well-being. Your proactive approach to self-care not only benefits you but serves as a living lesson for your children. Engage in physical exercise, maintain a balanced diet, seek professional help when needed, and foster healthy social connections.
Learn More on How to Be a Good Father with Strong Space Counselling
Fatherhood can be a wonderfully turbulent blend of love, sacrifice, and commitment. Embracing these principles, you embark on a journey of not just becoming a good father but an exceptional one. Each day offers a new opportunity to learn, grow, and strengthen the bonds with your children, crafting a legacy of love and support that stands the test of time.
Remember, the journey of fatherhood is both challenging and rewarding, with each day presenting an opportunity to make a positive impact on your child’s life. If you need more personalised support, speak with our dedicated counsellors at Strong Space today.